Sunday, May 22, 2011

Do You Text?

Deb loves the whole texting thing. She's just a youngin' - must give her an advantage. Me? Not so much. It's bad enough gettin' emails poppin' up on my cell phone. How 'bout you? You into it? Well, for people more MY AGE here's a brief tutorial. This should prove invaluable. Or maybe not.



TEXTING FOR SENIORS

Since more and more "Seniors" are texting and tweeting there appears to be a need for an STC (Senior Texting Code). If you qualify for Senior Discounts this is the code for you!

ATD: At The Doctor's

BFF: Best Friend Fainted

BTW: Bring The Wheelchair

BYOT: Bring Your Own Teeth

CBM: Covered By Medicare

CGU: Can't get up

DWI: Driving While Incontinent

FWBB: Friend With Beta Blockers

FWIW: Forgot Where I Was

FYI: Found Your Insulin

GGPBL: Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low!

GHA: Got Heartburn Again

IMHO: Is My Hearing-Aid On?

LOL: Living On Lipitor

OMMR: On My Massage Recliner

TTYL: Talk To You Louder

WAITT: Who Am I Talking To?

WTFA: Wet The Furniture Again

WWNO: Walker Wheels Need Oil

GGLKI: Gotta Go, Laxative Kicking In

Any suggestions to add to this list? PTH (post them here). CWTR (can't wait to read).

10 comments:

Mark LaFlamme said...

Add an I to CGU and you've got yourself a whole new set of problems, mister.

I can type on a full size keyboard with the speed of hurricane-driven winds. On a phone pad? Totally hunt and peck. I can grow a beard faster than I can punch out an average size message. When it comes to texting, I CGIU.

Joylene Nowell Butler said...

Hilarious, Dave! Thank you. What a riot. No, I don't text. I only carry a cell when I go to the city so everyone can call and bug me about how long I'm going to be, and would I mind picking up the chainsaw at Howie's Marine??? -- all this while I'm 20 minutes up the highway on my way home.

Carol J. Garvin said...

That's quite the list! (Can I say LOL?) I'm not one for texting altho' everyone around me seems to have constantly flying fingers. I use a few acronyms in my e-mails, but that's about it.

How about ASAP - Anxious Senior Accosting Pharmacist?

Laura Best said...

Not into texting at all. Now that I've read this list of yours I'm even more sure that it's not for me.. Shoot! I've been leaving LOLs all over the place. Who knew? Not me. LOL!

Thanks for the giggle. :)

David Ebright said...

Hear ya Mark. Deb uses her iPhone & texts like crazy. My fingers seem to catch 2 or 3 letters at a time so I don't bother. I still hunt & peck on the full size keyboard (& only use 3 fingers).

Joylene - I thought some of 'em were kinda funny. Chainsaw at Howie's Marine? I used to go to a place called Short's Marine. The bill was always $600+ - no matter what. I asked them once if that was a magic number. 600 bucks for spark plugs? Really?

Carol - Yes you can say LOL & I like your ASAP. I admit to liking Twitter but I'm probably TOTT. I've also heard acronyms are great in salads, if you marinate them first, haven't tried them with snails. Oh wait - you said emails. My bad.

David Ebright said...

Laura - Ya gotta love LOL, but I've heard Lipitor's not cheap. And you might not want to leave too many Lipitors around 'cause kids might get 'em.

Unknown said...

Hilarious!

I text, but I struggle with the whole concept of abbreviation. Some words simply make my skin crawl. Gr8 instead of great for example. Also, up until fairly recently, I thought LOL meant, lots of love - in my defense, we don't use that term in New Zealand. Crikey, no wonder kids today can't spell. Goodness, I sound like my mother!

Fun wee post :)

David Ebright said...

Wendy, for what it's worth, I like Crikey much better than LOL. Hmmm... New Zealand - birthplace of Keith Urban. We've seen his shows several times. Awesome. Had seats in the center 5th row from the stage @ one show & he flew overhead on a trapeze. Deb was really happy with the picture she got - but you can't see his face. She could probably tell you what brand of jeans he was wearin'. (I'll post some pics) On another note - didja know Capt. James Cook "discovered" NZ on his ship "ENDEAVOUR"? I'm sure it wasn't as luxurious as JaxPop's RECKLESS ENDEAVOR, but, by Crikey, it's still a cool coincidence - LOL. (Egads, I wrote LOL - blech! I gotta bleach my keyboard now.) Thanks for visitin'.

Anonymous said...

Loved this post!! You are on to something here!!! Perhaps a humor book idea!!!

Keith Pyeatt, author of paranormal thrillers said...

Hysterical. I had Verizon turn off my phone's ability to receive text, curmudgeon that I am. I'm FWBB and, at times, a WAITT. Ha. I may have to start texting so I can use these.