Monday, February 2, 2009

Rugrat Wisdom

Our oldest son Michael sent us a video of our granddaughter Isabel "reading" - She's 3 & doesn't actually read. She knows the story well enough that she goes page by page pretending to read the words. The jist of the story was - someone was getting married & she wanted to be the flower girl. Too bad I can't include the video. Bossy lil' thing that she is - Belly announced, as she finished, that "you can clap now" followed 5 seconds later by "Okay - that's enough". End of video.

Here's a bit of rugrat 'wisdom' - Someone sent this to me. I didn't write or collect any of it.

My young grandson called the other day to wish me Happy Birthday.......he asked me how old I was, and I told him, '52.' He was quiet for a moment, and then asked, 'Did you start at 1?'

After putting her grandchildren to bed, a grandmother changed into old slacks and a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair. As she heard the children getting more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin. Finally, she threw a towel around her head and stormed into their room, putting them back to bed with stern warnings. As she left the room, she heard the three-year-old say with a trembling voice, 'Who was THAT?'

A grandmother was telling her little granddaughter what her own childhood was like: 'We used to skate outside on a pond; I had a swing made from a tire that hung from a tree in our front yard; we rode our pony; we picked wild raspberries in the woods.' The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this all in. At last she said, 'I sure wish I'd gotten to know you sooner!'

A little girl was diligently pounding away on her grandfather's computer. She told him she was writing a story. 'What's it about?' he asked. 'I don't know,' she replied. 'I can't read.

I didn't know if my granddaughter had learned her colors yet, so I decided to test her. I would point out something and ask what color it was. She would tell me and was always correct. It was fun for me, so I continued. At last she headed for the door, saying, 'Grandma, I think you should try to figure out some of these yourself!'

When my grandson and I entered our vacation cabin, we kept the lights off until we were inside to keep from attracting pesky insects. Still, a few fireflies followed us in. Noticing them before I did, he whispered, 'It's no use Grandpa. Now the mosquitoes are coming after us with flashlights.'

When my grandson asked me how old I was, I teasingly replied, 'I'm not sure.' 'Look in your underwear, Grandpa,' he advised. 'Mine says I'm four to six.'

Children's Logic: 'Give me a sentence about a public servant,' said a teacher. The small boy wrote: 'The fireman came down the ladder pregnant. 'The teacher took the lad aside to correct him. 'Don't you know what pregnant means?' she asked. 'Sure,' said the young boy confidently. 'It means carrying a child.'

A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children started discussing the dog's duties.' 'They use him to keep crowds back,' said one child. 'No,' said another. 'He's just for good luck.' A third child brought the argument to a close. 'They use the dogs,' she said firmly, 'to find the fire hydrants'.