Tuesday, September 30, 2008

REDNECK CALIMARI

I'm a ridiculously picky eater. Coffee has to be fresh & strong. Meat has to be trimmed. Can't stand chicken (yard bird). Don't like green veggies - 'cept asparagus. Bananas have to be a little green. Won't try tofu. No microwaveable or frozen anything. No packaged out of the box dump it boiling water stuff. Hamburger has to be lean sirloin. (Oreos w/ milk is always the perfect meal.) Salad's OK, but I like it made with spring mix, little pieces of fruit & nuts - not regular lettuce & dressing. I probably drive Deb nuts & lemme tellya - she spoils me rotten with things like shrimp fra diavlo, blackened mahi, seasoned rib eye, mussels marinara, clams casino, almost anything Italian, yadda yadda yadda. I do compromise when it comes to pizza.

One thing that Deb likes & I absolutely detest is calimari. Dave don't do no calimari. I've got rubber bands in the desk that I'd rather chew on. So here's the deal: We go to a particular place for pizza from time to time. Deb gets the small Mediterranean - which has clams, shrimp, crab, & CALIMARI on it. Yuck. I get a small whatever doesn't have calimari on it pizza. I won't get one medium with her topping favorites on half 'cause I'm afraid a calimari might get loose & wriggle onto 'my side'. So we end up having to buy 2 'specialty' pizzas (same as regular pizza with an inflated price), a coupla Bud Lites & the stinkin' bill is always around 50 bucks - for stinkin' pizza.

There's only one thing worse than calimari, hot dogs, green beans & fake macaroni & cheese in my book - & that would be REDNECK CALIMARI as pictured below. NO WAY!!!



4 comments:

Vodka Mom said...

that is the most disgusting thing i've ever seen. and I'll eat anything.

JaxPop said...

It's not as gross as the picture I'm using tomorrow showing our Washington chuckleheads at work....
Thanks for visiting

Heinous said...

But they have eyes and everything. I bet it tastes just the same.

jenboglass said...

It's hideous, yet I cannot look away. Sort of like Sarah Palin's bangs.

But now, I'm hungry. I've never liked hot dogs until I hit my thirties. Now I'm all about gourmet dog. I'm so cutting my son's hot dogs like that. He'll think they look like an octopus!